That feeling when you realise, that every guy you've dated, has someone else immediately afterwards or even during the relationship. It takes a toll on your self esteem and on your hopes to find someone else. You are insignificant to that person, they treat like everyone else, take you for granted, or lesser. They perceive you to behave as if nothing is a big deal and that the relationship has ended long back, so why fuss? Those relationships have affected and hurt me, which takes a very long time to recover from. I just don't want to be pushed to an extent, of what I have is just my tears

This is a cry for help,
I don't know how to put myself back together,
I'm like a broken porcelain doll.
I have anger and rage which is uncontrollable,
Feels like I want to punch and kill people.
I'm in despair. 

Oh, how it feels so wonderful when you do so much for a person,
But they seem to let you down every time. 

Expression

I find expression with people,
Much harder than I had before,
I wonder who can I trust,
Or who will tolerate these,
Lurking, deep emotions beneath.
Day by day, less I have to converse,
As I think there's not much to my life,
Or a not much to expect,
But just in these damp, sullen,
Damned depression of mine. 

Help

We all say that we are the heroes of ourselves....
But sometimes I really do wish, deep down
That someday, some one would,
Come and find me,
Help me find my broken pieces,
And put me back together again.
Since I'm trying to recover from my great fall. 

Run

She never even had suicidal thoughts,
More than that, it was the urge to run away,
She wanted to do this because,
So that she wouldn't hate herself,
Instead love herself a little more.

Under those cute giggles and laughs,
Was a girl waiting to push herself out,
But the thing that was pressing her down,
Was the past depression and miseries,
Which still haunt and hurt her till date.

Therefore she wanted to run,
Far far away, till the pain would fade,
Apart from the place that had made her crawl,
To get back up on her two feet,
She did not have the will to be pushed down again. 

Escape from pain

I want to cry, cry really badly.
He wants me to support him,
For the things I want to run away from.
Deep inside, it stings, of all the things he does.
Why never with me?
Is that girl, better than I am?
Every time I think,
I feel like I could have done something more,
Or maybe different.
I hate how I'm still in despair.
No matter how much I recover,
This all still comes crawling back,
With more pain than ever.
I can't wait to run away,
From all of this.
This damsel weeps inside, lost than ever.